For as long as I can remember, I have only had one New Year’s resolution: become a better speller. After re-reading most of my columns this last year, I think I am going to expand this resolution to improve my grammar, punctuation and style. This has probably been the busiest and most productive year since … Continue reading
You know you have problems when the last thing you see and the first thing you check in the morning is your Twitter account. My recent bout with laryngitis brought me to the doctor who is forcing me to stop eating fatty and spicy foods and drinking alcohol if I want to stop speaking like … Continue reading
The Nativity of Jesus is a relatively simple story. A carpenter and his pregnant wife wander through the hillsides of Bethlehem looking for refuge through the night. Stopping at various inns, they are denied shelter until a kindly shopkeeper allows them to sleep in his stables. During the night, the woman gives birth to a … Continue reading
Now I have a machine gun. Ho ho ho! My favorite Christmas movie of all time is Die Hard. It’s a heart wrenching tale of lost love reconnecting in Los Angeles on Christmas Eve. Detective John McClane flies from New York City to hook up with his estranged wife who coincidently looks old enough to … Continue reading
It takes 119.5 seconds to pour a perfect pint of Guinness. That is almost two minutes. In an Irish pub that is the blink of an eye. In a dueling piano bar that is a millennium. The only time I ever lost my cool at Keys On Main was the very first night I worked … Continue reading
Show of hands: Who is voting for Rick Santorum? Who has a Michelle Bachmann sign on their front lawn? Am I the only person who thought Newt Gingrich was dead? Does Rick Perry scare anyone else than beside me and people on death row in Texas? If Gary Johnson walked into your living room and … Continue reading
It is thirteen days out from Christmas and the holiday season is in full swing at Keys On Main. The stocking have been hung on the pianos with care with hope that St. Nick won’t request Journey for the umpteenth time. I am not able to enjoy the holiday spirit in song because I am … Continue reading
I actually have a lot in common with George Clooney. Outside of the natural physical resemblance, similar career path and propensity to spend time with supermodels, George and I share the fact that we are both recovering from Bell’s palsy. My dear and close friend, George, contracted Bell’s palsy when he was in middle school … Continue reading
I am a natural athlete. Graced with a body like a Greek Adonis, cat-like reflexes and strength like a Mack truck, through great genetics and a work effect that is second to none, I honestly believe that I incorporate all of the good parts of the Bible on the playing field of life. I have … Continue reading
I got to make the allusive $10 cocktail at Keys On Main last Thursday. It was a Rob Roy made with Macallan 12-year old Scotch whisky and sweet vermouth. I like to add a drop of maraschino cherry juice and a dash of Angostura Bitters to the bottom of the glass and swirl the liquor … Continue reading
